Random Thoughts- Different Direction in Life


3-27-08

I felt kind of tired these last couple of days and I really didn’t know why. I went to bed early every night and now I am so refreshed that it is sort of unusual. Everyone around me is sleep on this bus on the way to Atlanta. Now on to something else that happened last night. Someone told me that she thinks that I am calming down and becoming “real leader” now. That sort of disturbed me a bit because I have always considered myself to be a real leader. I guess I didn’t come in the clothes that she expected. I think I am going to look in my purse to see if I have my jump drive so I can work on my book a bit. I haven’t picked that up in a while so I might see what I can come up with. I need to go ahead and publish my poetry because I am just sitting on it. It’s not like someone is reading it now. I should stop being ashamed of it. I am a pretty good poet actually which is why I secretly call myself lyric. I have trouble setting it to music but I am an excellent lyricist.

Right now WA is crying. I think she is missing her father. I don’t know how that feels because by the grace of God, I still have my daddy. I love him to death, but sometimes I don’t know if he is mad at me or just grumpy. I pray that I haven’t disappointed him. I know he used to brag about my being in college and stuff to his co workers and I didn’t finish. I plan on going back in May to finish in December. I know it will be tough and I will have to sacrifice a lot to complete school but it is something that I have to do. I want to start graduate school in January of 2009 for Business Management. I think I have aptitude for anything that I put my mind to. I want to emphasize in International Business. I would love to work from home and travel to different sites to check on my “clients”.

I applied for a promotion at EMA. I know it is my position. I have to prepare for my interview and make sure I secure the job. I have to have a plan for the center and my main focus will be to try to develop these knuckle headed people that they hire. I think we should switch to a coaching model which is so much more effective in my opinion. We should also stop babying people who don’t desire to comply with what we are trying to do. I must admit that a recent hire greatly disappointed me. I f I would have known that his primary focus was to remain off the phone at any cost, I would have never taken him on my team. I feel betrayed in a sense. I guess the atmosphere has changed in our corner because I can only work with people who are up front with me.
SML has so much potential but it is as if she looses sight on her goal. It is not my intention to hold her back in any way. She just needs to get her head on straight and come to work. I wish she was farther along than she is but you can lead a horse to the water but you can’t make him drink. We make it back to the water every so often. I just wish she would.

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